Yvonne Conte's Blog

Stress seems to be a big problem for people of all ages especially lately with everything that’s going on in the news. I read recently that the symptoms of too much stress in our life is excessive eating, excessive drinking not getting enough exercise and over spending…which scared me because that’s my description of a great day -a delicious meal, a good glass of wine, skip the gym, buy three pair of shoes that I don’t need and I’m happy. Continue reading →

For many of us memorial day means get the grill and lawn chairs out of their winter hiding place and plan a family picnic. Truly, this is a day for remembering those that have lost their lives protecting our country. I asked my mom what type of celebration they used to have when she was a little girl and I was surprised at her response. Continue reading →

For lent this year instead of giving something up I decided to do a random good deed a day. It was such a positive experience that I’ve decided to continue it indefinitely. Try doing something nice for someone else at least once a day. Serving others actually makes us feel good about ourselves because we know it’s the right thing to do. It could be as simple as opening a door for someone or helping with a baby stroller or letting someone go ahead of you in line. The looks on their faces and the gratitude you receive is priceless. I was in a grocery store and the woman ahead of me was a few dollars short and had to put a package of meat back. It just broke my heart. I simply handing the woman the few dollars she needed and said, “Please allow me to bless you today.” She was very surprised and thanked me over and over. Continue reading →

With all the events in Boston and in Texas this past week, I must confess, I’ve been glued to my television set. I feel I have to know what’s going on in the world but I also know, if I’m not careful I can get pretty depressed about the events in the news and it can keep me from enjoying life. Filling our heads with only bad news is very bad for our health and well being. Hearing constant bad news about the economy only makes matters worse.

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Several years ago I thought about what to get my mother for her birthday. I thought , what would make her happy? She LOVES to get mail. I emailed all my friends and asked them to send her a birthday card. She was over the moon happy to get the cards. Continue reading →

Words with a “K” sound in it are funny. “Cupcake” is funny…“Tomato” is not funny. —Neil Simon, The Sunshine Boys

     If we can change our mood, we can change our future. Living in the past is like driving into the future looking in the rearview mirror. This is helpful advice, but how do we take control of the situation with humor? How can we turn a difficult task into an easy one? This next story illustrates how a man turned an otherwise annoying situation into a great, funny story.

     A speeding motorist caught by a roadside camera tried to play a little joke when police sent him a speeding ticket. The notice included a photograph of the car, the date, the speed, and demanded payment of a fine. The motorist sent back a picture of a check.

Police sent back a photograph of handcuffs. The motorist got the message and mailed the real check. The story appeared in countless papers, bringing laughter to its readers.
When you’re in the middle of an upsetting situation, take a moment to find something funny about it. Laugh at the negative situations that happen.

I’m a pretty relaxed, down-to-earth person when I am at home, but when at these big conventions, I’m dealing with highly sophisticated, well…I call them big shots. I try hard not to say something stupid and act like an idiot. But no matter how hard I try to be sophisticated and polished, my true self always emerges. A woman that I’d been working with suggested we go get massages after the conference. This fancy spa is so relaxing with fountains, soft music, and scented candles. It’s beautiful. She introduces me to the masseuse and we go into our separate rooms. I lay down on the table, and this gal is doing such a great job— that I fell asleep.
She had to wake me to tell me to turn over. She lifted the sheet so that I could roll over, but I’m so disoriented because I just woke up that I roll away from her, instead of towards her and I fall off the table. She drops the sheet and grabs one of my feet and one of my arms to keep me from hitting the floor. She was quick. Here I am hanging off the table, naked as a jaybird. How do you recover from that kind of humiliation? All I could do is laugh. She said, “Are you alright?” I said, “Oh, honey, this happens to me all the time. My life is a never-ending sitcom. Let’s just get back on the table and finish this up.” We get in the car to head back to the hotel and the woman that I was working with, after hearing all the commotion asks me, “What was all that racket in there?” And I said, “Oh, that. That was my self-esteem falling off the table.”

An ancient Chinese proverb states that “A person without a smiling face must not open a shop.” That makes sense. We frequent places where people make us feel good, where people give us a smile, remember our name, maybe even say something nice. I have my morning coffee at an adorable little café filled with the aroma of freshly baked pastries and dark brewed coffee. The coffee is so strong I have to dilute it with water, and pastries are a little too high in fat for me, I still love going there for one reason: the sweet Italian lady who works there. She hugs me and tells me I look beautiful. I need that more than coffee most mornings. She asks me what I’m up to, asks about my children, sisters and mom. I noticed she does this with everyone, however, I like to think I’m special and she just really likes me. It’s a great way to begin my day on a high note and with a smile.A happy heart makes the face cheerful. —Proverbs 17:22

Do you snap the minute something goes wrong? Are you the first to panic when you’re late? Do you worry about things before they happen? It’s time to look for some relief by spending time with children. They can amuse, tickle and thrill themselves with a shoelace, three margarine tubs and a broken yo-yo, and so can you, if you open your eyes. Our world is filled with situations ripe for our pure enjoyment. Children are masters at finding that joy everywhere.
Author Ashley Montagu says, “By learning to act more like a child, human beings can revolutionize their lives becoming for the first time, perhaps, the kinds of creatures their heritage has prepared them to be—youthful all the days of their lives.”
Adults oftentimes feel that giggles and guffaws are sort of like, Starbucks – nice to have, but not a luxury most of us can afford. We have bills to pay, goals to achieve, people to please. Simple pleasures of knock-knock jokes, amusing pratfalls and adeptly censored one-liners are frivolous and unnecessary. My niece and her husband were on their way back to New York after a vacation at Disney. Her four children were securely buckled into their seats when the plane came into rough weather. As the plane jumped threw the air, passengers held on for dear life. Panic, fear and shock was prevalent throughout the cabin. Immediately the kids began to raise their hands up over their heads and shout in unison, “Weeeeeeeee, Weeeeeeee.” The tiny tots giggled and continued to raise their arms over their heads each time the plane hit an air pocket. The children decided to make the most of the situation, while the adults chose to be frightened. When the passengers noticed the children’s reaction, they too began to laugh. The more people laughed, the less stress there was in the cabin.
The same thing was happening to both the children and adults in the plane. They were all being rocked about due to the choppy weather. The difference was, the kids decided to enjoy the ride. By observing children we are reminded to enjoy all of life, even in difficult times. It matters not what your circumstances are, you have the power to enjoy life right now, in this moment. Make a choice to find the funny side of life. Try thinking like a little child. The next time you get together for a family dinner, sit at the children’s table. It’s more fun there. Maintain your youthful enthusiasm all the days of your life; lighten up you’ll live longer.

Humor is a skill that requires daily repetition and practice. What’s the one thing we have control over? Our actions. The way in which we respond to a situation. We have the power of choice. We can either choose to use the skills or choose to find an excuse not to.
If you recognize what makes you laugh, how will that improve your humor skills? Easy. Open up your eyes, ears, nose, and all of your senses. Be ready to find the funny. Your sense of humor is simply your ability to see the absurdity in difficult situations. My most stressful situation is driving. I’m always on a mission; everyone else is on vacation. I get behind the guy who likes to slow down for the garage sale but never quite pulls over. To be careful that I don’t boil over When I’m stuck in a traffic jam, I keep my stress-buster in the glove compartment. While waiting for traffic to move, I put on my red clown nose and wait for the driver next to me to react. If I’m on the Garden State Parkway, it takes a while before anyone looks at me. When they do, some still don’t laugh, so I put on my Smile-on-a-Stick.
That usually does the trick. It makes me laugh. It passes time without getting me all worked up. I have accomplished something. I’ve made someone laugh who probably was as stressed out as I was. It works.
You may think this is not what normal people do. You’re right, who wants to be normal? Only dead fish swim with the stream! Shakespeare said, “Things are neither good nor bad but thinking makes it so.” If you think acting a bit wacky will help you through the day, it will. You can be different. You can be creative. You can get wacky. You can go bananas. It works. Your humor skills allow you to take yourself lightly while taking your work seriously. Put a little zip in your step. Spread some joy around the office. Giggle; smile for no apparent reason; be happy.

A woman came up to me after a presentation shared this story about the loss of her husband. She said, “My husband died last year. I cried non-stop. I was making myself sick, I cried so much. My heart was broken. He was my soul mate, my love. I didn’t know how to live without him. For a change of pace, my sister-in- law invited me to go to the Bahamas. I stopped crying and enjoyed the few days in the sun. On our last night, in a crowded restaurant, everyone was having a great time, the music was beautiful, the view of the ocean was lovely, the food was delicious and I thought…my husband would have just loved this.”  At that moment, I burst into uncontrollable tears. People stopped talking and looked over at me. The waitress came to the table with the check and she sort of froze, and my sister-in-law looked up at the waitress and said, “She does this every time the check comes.” At that moment, I burst into laughter-uncontrollable laughter.”  That is the positive power of humor.